01/22/2014 08:48
Today is National Answer Your Cat’s Questions Day!
Yes, unfortunately, they made a day for that, and you can read all about it here. There’s pretty much a day for anything these days. But, if for some reason your favorite thing doesn’t already have its own day, I’m sure you could just make it up and post about it on the Internet, so that it becomes a thing. Because everything that’s on the Internet is true.
Anyhow, I thought it would be fun for my favorite character, Lizzie Hart from IT’S JUST A LITTLE CRUSH, amateur sleuth and reluctant cat owner, to answer her cat Bob’s questions. Here’s what they came up with…
Bob: Lizzie, why are you such a bit—
Lizzie: Bob! Watch your language!
Bob: Fine. I hate you.
Lizzie: That’s not a question, Bob. And, I know.
Bob: What happened to the nice old lady that was here before? I liked her.
Lizzie: That was my grandmother. She died and left you in my care.
Bob: I think I would rather have taken my chances at the animal shelter.
Lizzie: Don’t think that’s not still an option, jerk.
Bob: What about that guy that comes over all the time?’
Lizzie (getting dreamy-eyed): You mean Blake?
Bob: Yeah, that must be the one. You’re getting all girly. I like him. He seems to like me. Why can’t I go live with him?
Lizzie: I don’t get that thing you two have going on. But I promised my grandmother I’d look after you, so that’s what I’m doing. Any more questions, Bob? Or are we about done here?
Bob: One more. There was a big commotion here a while back with a whole bunch of people coming in and out of the house, so I had to hide. Then you were gone for a long time and that nice man Blake came by to feed me. What was that all about?
Lizzie: Well, if you must know, that was when my boss threw me down the basement stairs and tried to kill me. All of those people were police and EMTs, and I was gone because I was in the hospital for a while.
Bob: Hmm. So making someone fall down the stairs isn’t going to kill them.
Lizzie: Apparently not. I guess all of those times you tried to trip me on the stairs were all for nothing, then.
Bob (under his breath, wishing he had a notebook and some thumbs): Note to self. Must come up with new plan to end her.
Lizzie: I heard that!
